“I don’t know why I go to extremes. Too high or too low, their ain’t no in between.” Billy Joel
In between is the sweet spot. The place where we find the seemingly elusive balance. Where the pendulum rests.
Decisions are often are made in extremes as a result of something going too far. An argument, a policy, a death. As if going to the completely other side will somehow bring balance and the pendulum will rest. But gravity is inevitable and the pendulum slowly swings back to center – in between.
In between can also be a place where guilt resides when we don’t do enough. Or, when we do too much and our relationships and health suffer.
However in between is where we find solutions. Where we compromise and seek first to understand – first inside ourselves then with others. In between is judgement free. In between is where forgiveness and love live.
“The space between is where you’ll find me waiting for you.” Dave Matthews.
When I was high school in Jersey, we ate Wise potato chips at lunch. I wish these tasted like sour cream and onion, or barbeque or vinegar or salt and vinegar, or cheddar, said no one. Or, “who thinks these would be better with ridges?” They were delicious just as they were, crunchy, salty and greasy. Nowadays, there are over 20 varieties of Wise potato chips. Crest toothpaste, now comes in 36 varieties. Baskin Robbins…well, that’s a constant.
Much time is wasted laboring over choices. What more do we need to occupy our minds. I mean there is no lack of distractions and shiny objects in our life, and now another time suck is choice. Why? Because of the fear of making the wrong choice. In fact, I believe we know the choice we need to make and then talk ourselves out of it, or find enough people to help us rationalize why the wrong choice is the right one and we become paralyzed by a fear to choose so we don’t make a choice. Kapeesh?
The resources we have available to make choices range from our abstract intuition, to concrete education. And then of course there is no choice, which is still a choice. Some people never make their own choice and choose what the masses choose because to choose differently would mean to be different, and different sticks out and can be subject to criticism or ridicule.
Today I invite you to just make a choice and feel the decision. You get to choose again if you don’t like your choice, and, you get the experience of choosing. Or not. You choose.